i get this monthly newsletter from the council on cultural arts in our fair city… i normally just delete it without giving it a second thought. but a few days prior i had had a conversation with a friend about how much i loved this photo series i did entitled baggage; that it really was the first time i have felt that i am an artist. i mean, i know i’m pretty good at photography (not tooting my own horn), but i have seen myself grow so much in the past two years. but this was different. somehow i felt changed after this series. i saw myself in that series, and all the baggage i have and have clung to in the past couple years (i think i still have a carry-on to get rid of).
anyway, in the conversation with my friend, i said that i felt pretty confident that this work could be shown somewhere, or hung somewhere (coffee shop, etc.) so i sent off for prints, just to see how they would look. then two days later i get this newsletter. for some reason (perhaps serendipity), i decide to open it, and there, in the second paragraph, is a “call for artists” for a new gallery that will be opening. i didn’t even hesitate. i put together an artist’s bio and statement (which they asked for), and sent a link to my baggage series and a series i had just done the day before entitled the mission. still thinking maybe i should show more diversity, i sent another set with a few other photos that showed nature shots and some of my other fun quirky type shots.
i guess i’m telling you all this, because if i would have opened that email a month earlier, i’m not sure i would have had the confidence in myself as an artist to send anything. and even still, the minute i hit send, i had a few of those voices pop up in my head that said, they are going to think your work sucks! ha. but i’ve been able to hush most of those. i’m not going to let those voices win this time.
so i wait. and wait. my daughter asked me if i felt like i was waiting to find out if i had made the team. ha! (she’s 12, and has tried out several times for sports this year and has not made it). i told her, yes, exactly that’s how i felt. and she said words that i have said to her: mom, if you don’t make it this time, you keep on trying.
yes. i’ll keep trying.
so a question for you: what are your dreams? what do you want to do that you haven’t taken that step to do? what would help you to do that? do you need more confidence? do you need more experience? what are your passions?
i would love to hear.
after listening to the new depeche mode album, sounds of the universe, i was inspired to start a series using this mask. i’ve always been fascinated with the way we hide our true identity, how we put on different masks for different people, different facets of our lives. i have always wished i could take all of my many masks off and just be me. but for some reason, it’s just so difficult. i think the older i get, i am slowly starting to remove some of them, but some of them are so hard to take off…. for one reason or another. i’m hoping to explore this idea through this series, and through the help of a little depeche mode….
